All My Single Ladies (and fellas)--Finding Your Perfect Match- By Anthony Dierek

[Author's note: I wrote this piece as a guide for all my single friends who are impatiently awaiting the arrival of their soulmate.]

        Finding your perfect match is like finding a hand bag to match your new shoes. Dating and shopping are more similar than you think. Sometimes you leave the store and you're confident that the bag you bought will be the perfect match, but when you get home you realize that you were wrong. So rather than give up, you find your receipt, you return it, and you continue shopping until you find the right one. If you're not happy with your hand bag, TAKE IT BACK! You can't settle for a bag that "will just work for now". You owe it to yourself, and your "shoes" to have high standards.

       The key is to realize that you deserve the best. Decide that your closet only has room for designer brands not cheap knock offs that will fall apart the next morning. Quality is everything. Buying a purse that you don't love is like dating a person that you're really not that into. In the long run, the true feelings will eventually surface. What will happen is, you will wear the purse once and never wear it again. While you want to be somewhat picky, don't get too caught up on the outward appearance of your bag. While there does need to be some attraction, you don't know if your perfect bag will come in the form of a sequined clutch, a coin purse, or a full sized bag--You also don't know exactly what color it may be, so keep your options open.

      Here's a tip. When you're looking for a handbag to go with your shoes, DO NOT go digging through your closet trying to make an old bag work with new shoes. You stopped carrying those bags for a reason. Leave them alone. In other words, leave your ex's and old "friends with benefits" alone. There is a reason you stopped talking to them, just trust that you had good judgment when you left them. When you know your ex is bad for you, just lie to yourself and repeat these words: PEOPLE NEVER CHANGE, PEOPLE NEVER CHANGE, PEOPLE NEVER CHANGE, until you believe that they will always be the same douche bag that they were when you broke up. Listen, I'd rather have cute shoes and no bag, than cute shoes and a hot mess of a bag which doesn't match. A raggedy hand bag can ruin an entire outfit. That may sound harsh but sometimes in the long run being harsh can be beneficial. I am a strong believer in forgiveness, but I am also a strong believer in learning from your mistakes. My philosophy is: Screw me over once, shame on you, screw me over again, I should feel as dumb as I look for taking you back.

      Backseat shoppers! A second opinion is always useful when shopping, but it isn't always necessary. Where a friend may help you pick out the right bag, only you should be wearing it. In other words, a best friend’s opinion is nice, but keep some things sacred. Involving too many people in your dating life will only complicate things. Grow a pair and learn how to handle your own issues. You will find that by not passing around your new bag for all of your friends to borrow, down the road the wear and tear will be minimal.

      Lastly, just remember that you don’t NEED a bag in order to wear your shoes. A hand bag is an accessory not a necessity; the same applies with your future significant other. Once you decide that you don't need a handbag in order to survive, you will stumble across the perfect one!

-Anthony Dierek
1.15.2010